We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Listening to the First Rain of Spring Through the Window in my Bedroom

by Big Aluminum

/

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

lyrics

It's taken me way to long to realize,
But I've finally figured out,
There's no way this world will ever stop,
Giving me things to be sad about,
My teenage angst is gone,
Replaced with grown man rage,
And I'm afraid this pit in my stomach won't ever really go away,
But I guess it's all just part of growing up,
I'm still as fragile as I've ever been,
But god knows it's taken me long enough,
To feel these emotions,
But now I'm hoping,
A step in the right direction,
Will be enough to teach me my lesson,
And ultimately fix what's broken,

Cause I'll let you down,
If you let me let you down,
No if's ands or buts about it,
I can change but I sure doubt it,
At least for now,
Because at least in this instance,
You've figured out,
That I'm most comfortable when I'm distant,

Everyone I idolize is fucked in the head as bad as I am,
So what does that mean for me,
Especially in the short turn,
Cause I fear the future just like everybody else,
But I've got to get there first,
And I don't like who I've become,
I can't stand the sight of myself,
Or the thought of how I disappoint you everyday,
And I'm sure tomorrow won't be the exception,
No matter what bullshit I try and throw your way,
But you'll always be there,
Right there next to me,
With a smile on your face,
Asking how my day was,
Or what's in my head,
At least until I finally push you away,
And I don't wanna push you away,
I don't want to,
I don't want you,
I just want you,

To be my cellphone,
I'll carry you everywhere in my pocket,
And I can't go a day without you,
But I'll still treat you like an object,
It's what I'm used to,
And deep down it's what you really want,
Because when it comes to instinct you think you actually have a shot,

You ask me why I get like this,
I wish that I could tell you,
I promise I'll snap out of it,
At some point don't I have to,
I swear it's never been this bad,
So I don't know what to say,
The pain isn't permanent,
But damned if it doesn't feel that way,
Cause after tonight,
My car smells like I'll be driving,
To work with my windows down,
B it's not surprising,
That I can see my breath,
Or that it reminds me,
Of the smoke in my lungs,
From the nights I've put behind me,

I'll let you down,
If you let me let you down,
No if's ands or but's about it,
I can change but I sure doubt it,

credits

released October 23, 2020
Chris Bolin - Guitar/Bass/Vocals
Mike Rhien - Drums
Jason Keller - Backing Vocals
Sparrow Heart Records

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Big Aluminum image

Big Aluminum Greeley, Colorado

contact / help

Contact Big Aluminum

Streaming and
Download help

Report this track or account

If you like Big Aluminum, you may also like:

Bandcamp Daily  your guide to the world of Bandcamp

On Bandcamp Radio

Featuring interviews with LA music scene pillar Kamasi Washington, and new London-based duo Mrcy.

listen now